If anybody is going to ask me what my high school was like, it’s a mixture of unforgettable friends, alienation, useless subjects and funny teachers. But I’d still say the majority was about the insecurity-fueled cold wars that never seemed to end. And of course, there were the endless nights up worrying if I failed my Advanced Algebra class.

In any typical high school, there are alot of groups that you can identify yourself with. Prominently in ours, there were the it-girls, braniacs, band people, retarded (literally), the mundane, and then there was me. I transferred to the other section in my junior. There were only two remaining sections that year, and for the life of me - I had to move because I didn’t do well in my maths. I became pretty popular, then people started to look at me in a different way.

I honestly hated high school. I’ve always indentified myself as an alien to the hundreds of students in my school. I was the groupie. I was the Photoshop dork. I was the failure. I was an awardee. All of these things eventually added up to make me who I am today. Of course I made it out alive in high school and graduated with my limbs still intact but the friendships I made back then didn’t seem to survive the post-high school apocalyptic days. I’m in a position to identify myself with the world. Sometimes when I see photos of my high school batch mates in Facebook and see them all together, it makes me feel alone. I never get invited to high school batch (reunion) parties. I am outside the circle. Maybe that makes me a loser - maybe not. Maybe it just goes to show that I’m smart enough to know how to sort the rotten and the good.

“You hated me in high school so why are you requesting me as a friend now?”

After high school, it probably came natural that I cut the connections myself. I was at most, hurt from everything that happened then. And I am going to be vulgar to the fact that I still have adverse feelings towards certain people. (read: Michelle Catalan)

I chose those people who I wanted to reconnect with, tied loose ends and rekindled friendships. From high  school, I can honestly say only a handful of people remained close friends with me and still regularly talk to. I chose not to rely on people to hold my shit. I hold my own. If you were in my batch, and we’re not talking in friend terms, maybe I did something to you and you did something to me. I’m genuinely sorry and very thankful all the same. But it’s different this time. I’m now better than the person you met in high school.

On a very serious note, please don’t add me in Facebook if we are not in speaking terms. It annoys me to no end. 

In hard times, you find those true friends who will pull you out of the fire. I know who those are in my life right now. I’m going to stick with them and I know they will do the same for me. I do hope you find yours. See you in seven years time in our high school reunion.